Gay Guys, please read and advise me on what to do.
down_so_down said on April 25, 2003 09:57:
Hi Guys, I need someone to talk to, I feel so down at the moment. I met the Guy of my dreams... it all started last week, I was on Gaydar (anyone know this site??). Well, I got chatting to this cool guy and we decided to meet up the same day, well basically just an hour later. We went to his place and were all over each other... we had such a great time in bed, it was like... yes, we just clicked... afterwards we watched some TV and had such a nice talk... I was never in a relationship with another guy before... because I am not out... he was so nice to me, and we had such a good time.... sadly I had to leave very soon that day but we met up again for a “Date” the following week. When we met again, we had a shag, afterwards we went out to this nice lil coffee place, got something to eat and went to the movies afterwards... during the film I was holding his hand the whole time and our fingers were playing with each other and my hands was on his lap the whole time... I loved this kind of affection from another man! After the film, we were going back to his place, I got introduced to his flatmate, we had a nice chat and then went into his bedroom and had a very nice time again... after we had sex, we were lying there, cuddled up to each other, holding each other really tight for longer than an hour, we were talking and kissing... just lying there, enjoying each others company... I couldn’t stay over that night so I left some time later... before I got into my car, we kissed again... on my way home, I got a really nice Text of him, telling me that he loved the night with me... a really flattering thing during our Date was, when his Flatmate rung, (who is gay also, by the way), all I could here was: “Yeah hi, .... I am fine... oh yes, I am on my big date right now...” When he said that, he winked at me and I was sooo flattered! It was like the perfect date, I thought we got on perfect... and I have totally fallen for him... that was on Wednesday the 23rd April, Yesterday on Thursday I emailed him and tried to get in touch with him... I got no reply to my email and was not able to get in touch with him otherwise... Today (Friday) I texted him again, asking if he is fine and if something is wrong... usually, he would always get back to me like within the next minute or so... but since yesterday, right after the perfect evening we spent together he doesn’t get back to me anymore... I don’t know what to feel or think... I am sooo down.. I have totally fallen for this guy, yes, I am head over heals...and I thought he was too, well, I know he was... but now... everything is sooo different... does anyone of you have a clue why he doesn’t get back to my emails or texts or phone calls? It is not that I tried to get in touch with him too many times, since our perfect date I sent him one email, two texts and tried to phone him twice... so he can’t be annoyed by me trying to get in touch with him too often... SHIT, I am so confused and down... can anyone of you guys give me some advise?? What would you do in such a situation??
Denstandigaresan said on April 25, 2003 12:47:
It’s Gaydar, what do you expect?? My friend used this site... same kept happening to him! Just cut your losses and move on!
StillFar said on April 25, 2003 12:51:
well there are different options. He could be either really busy or going through some problems you might not know of. Or he realized that you’re not the guy he wants and he uses a very impolite way to show it to you. I’d say you have to wait until you talk to him and get an explanation. Especially when we fall for someone we tend to over-exaggerate feelings…give it a few days until you know and keep your chin up!
down_so_down said on April 25, 2003 13:59:
Thanks Guys...
Not all Guys in Gaydar are bad...
You see, He is so special, I mean, we can talk for hours and hours, have got such romantic times together and have the greatest time in bed too... He didn’t even want to let me go the last time we met...
Well, I hope he is just busy though...
You see, from the very first moment I met him, I thought: “What a Guy!” We clicked immediately and he kept telling me, that he really wants to see me again and we talked to each other on the phone several times a day until we met again... and as I said, when we met again, everything was so perfect... anyways, I will leave it for now...
maybe in a week or two or maybe three I will let you Guys know what the outcome was.
Thanks for your advises though, I really appreciate it.
khowaga said on April 25, 2003 16:12:
I agree with StillFar: either he’s decided to end it (and rather rudely), or he’s been busy and something’s come up. Maybe he’s been in meetings all day long, and had a date to go out with some friends last night. It’s always annoying right at the beginning like that, but 95% of the time there’s some perfectly reasonable explanation. It has, after all, only been two days!
Keep your chin up. It’ll all work out somehow - you’ll see!
coyboyusa said on April 26, 2003 11:27:
lol most gay men are on the internet for sex not love.....you should be aware of that
ATLTK said on April 26, 2003 20:46:
oh so sad for u lets hopeb he´s just busy
hmm
I foundmy boyfriend on internet. on a unserious swedish site but he´s one of the seriouus guys there.
we have been together since february. known eachother since september.
I spend the whole easterv at his place, he lives 300km from me in linköping.
I had my aTBH with me cause he asked me to bring a romantic rcord with me... (isnt it romantic)
so it works really fine for me...
( u all know who i.m i.m the only swedish guy at this gay forum) but I changed nick since my dad figured out it was me..
P-p-p-pelle said on May 26, 2003 10:33:
As a straight man I tell you:
Crash!Boom!Bang is also applicable to gay people!
DaminehGessle said on May 28, 2003 21:47:
How old are you?? I am a very emotional person, straight though. But I think these things happen to most people. How can you expect someone fall for you so badly after 2 dates though? Doesn’t matter if he told you the date was great, people lie all the time. I don’t want to be mean or tell you to be hopeful but I guess you gotta move on.
JohnUK21 said on June 23, 2003 13:21:
How you doing now? Did you ever hear anything? You can chat to me if you like, my gaydar is www.gaydar.co.uk/groovyharlot
derek said on June 23, 2003 19:01:
@down so down i think that you let you heart do the talking and not your mind im bi myslf and when you let your heart rule your emotions that can lead to problems .maybe he also feels the same way about you. maybe he scared himself .and doesnt know how to responde all i can say is be patient with him and yourself and next time slow down dont move to fast if you want to talk ofline you know my email.iv been in your place
twotall37814 said on July 2, 2003 19:35:
hi im gay and im aloonly person i read half and i just wanted to write and leave a poem i wrote
“love is a knife
it cuts deep into your heart
it makes you bleed
its your hearts greatest need”
-Ritchie Dotson
i had it copy writed so don try to steal it
my e mail address is [email protected]
or [email protected]
carbon_boy said on July 3, 2003 09:34:
It’s true, that’s how 99% of the guys on Gaydar are. If he returns your text msg’es/emails or fones you up. Good. But dont mope around and sit and wait for him. If it happens it happens. And plz watch out: he might just be using you as well. I take it you’re still a young bloke? If thats the case: dont worry - a lot more boys will be coming your way!
Btw, you can have a chat with me - www.gaydar.co.za/carbon_boy
Cheers
PS: I met my bf on gaydar - been with him for 2 years. And ive never been happier.
JFG66 said on September 19, 2003 21:44:
What the fxxk with those faggots leaving their messages ! For God’s sake , stop sharing their stuffs or else get laid , do sth , but not here !
vaxjoe said on September 19, 2003 21:54:
“JFG66 9/19/2003 23:44 new
What the fxxk with those faggots leaving their messages ! For God’s sake , stop sharing their stuffs or else get laid , do sth , but not here ! “
Last time i checked its a free world we live in you ASSHOLE!!!
GET A LIFE!
=================================
Now to our friend:
You may find its hard to deal with gay guys or relationships on the whole.
Theres a large number of them that all they want is sex and they ll do anything to get it, even lie or pretend that they re in love.
I dont know your situation but it seems to me that this guy understood that u re “new” in all this and played his game. And you like an amateur got fooled and fell in love.
Dont worry it has happened to all of us. If thats the case have faith and move on...i hope he gets back to you but just in case..
down_so_down said on April 25, 2003 10:30:
I am sorry if I am just boring the hell out of you all with my boring love life...