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Im considering...
54 replies
Taysan said on November 30, 2001 13:34:
Please stay Roxie!!!!! And please mail back!!
dan-rox said on November 29, 2001 23:34:
i posted a message saying if you wanted to talk with with me roxie, so if you want ( i’m not an enemy ) my e.mail is [email protected]
roxchurch said on November 30, 2001 00:39:
We can’t smile without you roxie, can’t smile without you
We can’t laugh and we can’t write,We’re finding it hard to do anything ......
please think again ,before you leavå...
inganakee_leo said on November 30, 2001 00:53:
Roxie - don’t listen to these people who want only to harm us and to spoil our forum...
Please don’t leave us...
PEACE & LOVE
kookai said on November 30, 2001 05:20:
well, ROXIE, maybe then you should also consider seeing a psychologist.
If seriously, I still don’t get why you want to leave smth. If you wanna leave, then leave. Or maybe you just wanted to make a tragedy and make others cry...
PerFanatic said on November 30, 2001 06:19:
hey Roxie, don’t leave. There are plenty of people who like you here. Plus, we can’t afford to lose another American Rox-fan (gotta try to keep things balanced in here, eh?). So, stick around, won’t you?
Oh, and Kooky, I’m glad you are familiar with psychologists. Why don’t you look one up and go and get some help? I’m sure they could help you with your hate/temper problem and might even be able to cure your multiple personality disorder. (yes, we’ve all caught on that you and “kixboy” are the same, demented individual).
IPPIE said on November 30, 2001 08:01:
Hey Roxie,
Take a look at this. It is for you.
There are times when you feel you are not welcome,
.............., but it is not true.
There are times when you feel no one cares,
............., but it’s a lie.
There are times when people are wriling and just forget,
................., but you are never out of their hearts!
There are times when you think you are miserable,
............., but un this very same time you shouldn’t hide it
.....................and your friends will never let you go!
And one more thing – I doubt that the people here could really be enemies.At least I don’t want to believe it. I refuse to accept it.
PLEASE DON’T LOSE YOUR SMILE FOR NOTHING !!!
I am afraid of darkness and without your little star in the sky it won’t be shining that bright as it is now !
ixtlaner said on November 30, 2001 13:11:
Hey, Roxie, cheer up!! Please! I don’t believe you have enemies!
So stay, please, you’re more than welcome, lots more ppl will miss you! [despite their silence most of the time, they’re still here... ;]
kixboy said on November 30, 2001 18:16:
well yeah why dont go away? u always “threaten” to leave but u re still here! u re pathetic! always looking for other ppl’s pity! u make me sick...u re such a drama queen blah
ROXIEBABY16 said on November 30, 2001 18:46:
EXCUSE ME? YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW ME! HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT I AM PATHETIC? I HAVE ONE THING TO SAY TO YOU, YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE HELL I DEAL WITH EVERYDAY, I LIVE IN HELL EVERYDAY. so if i have to leave then wont you feel busted? My life sucks, your must be great and im glad for you. But before you ever criticize me again, wonder what the hell’s really buggin her? Also speaking of pathetic, im not the one starting wars with everyone for attention. SO leave me alone, i don’t need your input,
ROXIE
WorldFalls said on November 30, 2001 19:55:
I’m sure you’re a good person who is going through something pretty rough. But you are coming across as really hostile on some of the threads. It appears to me as though you are angry because people on the board (and probably in your off-board life) are not meeting your needs. I’m sorry if that is the case. But you’ll get more sympathy and support if you share your problems and allow people to interact with you the way they choose than you will if you attempt to manipulate people into feeling sorry for you.
Alienista said on November 30, 2001 20:53:
Roxie! Please, listen to us: Don’t leave!!!
Everything will be all right!!!
royalball said on December 1, 2001 10:36:
Hey Roxie! Whatever’s wrong will surely clear up one day...maybe not overnight. All I can say is that life is a pain. And most of the time...life just sucks.
You just need get involved in something you like. If you like music, then maybe you should study music...I know you think this might sound crazy, but studying music can really be a cool thing!
Studying music and guitar for was the most rewarding thing I ever did formyself. It sounds like you need to do something creative...even if it’s a damn painting class. Just don’t get caught up in drugs or alcohol...because it’s one thing to feel better and it’s another to be better...but you know that already...so I won’t preach to you about that. When you move on and go to school and get your career going, everything will be better I’m sure.
ROXIEBABY16 said on December 1, 2001 18:10:
Look i just need to go away for a few days, nothing to do with people here. I am not a good person right now. I am in fact a very stressed angry and hostile person. I’m trying something new, i am trying a spell and meditation, i hope it works. Look what i am going to do is, i am going to work this out and try to be who i was before all this happened to me, and calm the hell down. I am sorry to everyone, i just honestly feel alone in every aspect of my life. I have people who will tell you that i honestly have a real bad and rough life. It’s not like any of those that like to bother me and put me- who is normally in a great mood- really give a damn, but for those who do, i will tell you all, i guess it’s time. See next post.
ROXIE
ROXIEBABY16 said on December 1, 2001 18:32:
Ok here it is the entire thing in a nutshell,
My family life sucks, i have become a sort of Cinderella and a 16 year old mother to my family. My parents fight non stop. They put me down so bad-all of them-i have serious low self esteem and i have to remember everything for 6 people. I also help raise my 2 little cousins, i have worse self esteem cause no guy would ever want me, and i have a friend who always puts me down but i can’t get rid of her. I always feel lonely. My Parent’s are losing their minds. And my future seems pretty damn bleak cause my parents don’t know if they can afford the college i want to go to. I have more to tell tomorrow, it’s late and i can’t type much longer.
ROXIE
UrbanEscape said on December 2, 2001 09:57:
Hi RB. More than a few of us have been right where you are. I know what you’re going thru is tough, since I also went thru it. One thing I learned is it does get better. During this difficult time, it’s very important to always remember to stay true to yourself. Don’t do anything now that will get in the way of where you want to be in the future. Your whole life is in front of you – your life is just now beginning. Keep your friends close to you. If you need to talk, I’m here for you. Take care, my friend.
ROXIEBABY16 said on December 3, 2001 11:28:
Ok and for the middle section of my tradgedy,
My family likes to insult me. They never think what i do is good enough and im always the blame when something goes wrong in the house. I am like the maid. My grades are never good enough. I went through a 3 year depression that im still not quite over, i have a BF who i love very much but he lives far away and my parents would kill me if they knew his age. If something doesn’t get done then it’s cause i was too lazy to do it. If my sisters are lazy they say i never told them to do anything. When i was little i used to live in a very very bad neighborhood. I used to constantly get into trouble, and i was from 8 years old and up-maybe younger than that- sexually harrassed or abused-not by family. I used to play sports to hide, mostly i used to dance-i was for those of you who don’t know a ballerina-then i got a knee injury in soccer, and now i can’t do it. I am disabled, therefore i have faced discrimination and teasing all my life to the point of no return. I am a Witch which also causes persectution. I used to-during my depression-eat non stop. I was 215 lbs when i was in 6th grade. Now im not-thank goodness. But people like those who torment others should honestly think about what that person has going on in their life to make them that way. Please im almost begging you people, hatred and harm is not the way to be. I know this, i don’t like to hurt people, i am a peacemaker and people don’t always appreciate it. I try to be nice, but im losing it, im losing my mind and i can’t stop it. Please just don’t hurt people intentionally.
Peace,Love, and Harmony to all.
ROXIE
PerFanatic said on December 3, 2001 13:10:
Hey Roxie,
I think there are no more than 1 or 2 mean people in this forum. Most of us seem to be the peaceful type and very supportive of each other, despite our varied backgrounds and upbringing. Music is the great “uniter”, especially the music of Mr. Gessle:) Hang in there... things will get better.
ArtistGrl said on December 3, 2001 14:15:
Hey Roxie, I’m kinda new here and mostly been an observer so far, but I must comment and say that many of us have harsh lives and go through that kind of stuff. I’m an 18 year old girl from Israel and been through some of your problems and many others (and yes those things do get better as you grow older and become more independent)...
In addition to that I have a whole set of different problems to deal with, I have to live with terrorism and fear every day, I know what real hatred and racism is like... there are many evil people in this world, much worse than the ones who like to annoy others on online forums... Remember no matter how bad things appear to be, they could always be worse. No point dwelling on the bad things... You seem to have lots of good friends (with a great musical taste) on this forum, if I were u, I wouldn’t leave a forum like that! :)
kachina008 said on December 3, 2001 15:08:
Roxie and Artistgrl, you are both in my thoughts.
*sigh*
be strong.
Taysan said on December 3, 2001 22:11:
Roxie, I think that there aren’t that many mean people here. And almost everyone reads your topics. So I don’t think the people here don’t care what you’re doing.
As I already said, maybe you should take some rest and relax. And don’t try to hide your feelings. I think that you should talk to your parents about your boyfriend and about how they treat you. Because the situation now doesn’t work.
I know it sounds all very easy, and it isn’t, but I think it is the right thing to do.
Love and Peace and Light
Taysan
ROXIEBABY16 said on December 4, 2001 10:45:
I need rest you are right, stress is another factor in my life. I am sorry for those that i have harmed in anyway. I guess i am a very mixed up person. I am so used to bottling things up in my life. And also to the person who dealt with Terrorism everyday, i lived with gangs and drive bys so i have a small idea of what that kind of fear was like. It’s not fun and i know my problems are molehills compared to almost everyone elses in here. But i just feel alone and lost and alone. My Boyfriend and i are fine, nothing really wrong there but i can’t get my parents to see. They are wearing their rose coloured glasses and only see what they want to see,not whats really there. Peace Love and Harmony To All!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-Roxie
-Gee- said on December 4, 2001 11:14:
mmm i wouldnt leave just because of suckers like kixboy....i’d just IGNORE thus f*ckwits, roxie.
ROXIEBABY16 said on December 4, 2001 11:37:
I’m workin on it!!!:):):):):):):):):):):) See i still smile!!!!!
ROXIE
IPPIE said on December 5, 2001 05:16:
Yes Roxie,,,
Go ahead,,,
I like it when you smile !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Fantastic !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
roxchurch said on December 5, 2001 08:54:
I can see that smile in your eyes.
Yes it’s true,
Right from the start,
WE believed in the church of your heart.
Step inside,
Lay yourself down just for a while,
Rest for a while.
and dream about the sun....
ArtistGrl is right –>those things do get better as you grow older and become more independent
I’ve been through some of your problems ,but now i almost forget these days...
THE GOOD DAYS COMING YOUR WAY AND THAT IS INESCABLE!!!!!
ROXIEBABY16 said on December 6, 2001 14:47:
“I can barely remember my past...”
Everything seems to disappear so fast..but i do recall being jealous and alone, gazing at the dreams going by.. I started my life you knocked on my door, found something inside i didn’t dare to ignore, now i do believe in flowers on the moon, i swim beside the golden tide... You crashed by the gates, captured my fate...Salvaaaaaaaaaatiiiiiiiiiiiiioooooooooooonn, my eyes couldn’t see i hardly breathed, i was down on my knees, Salvaaaatttttiiiiiiiiioooooooonnnn,
I found salvation....
i found it here amongst friends.
ROXIE
IPPIE said on December 7, 2001 03:57:
Roxie
These are very beautiful words I am sure we are all touched.
ROXIEBABY16 said on December 7, 2001 07:44:
Don’t thank me thank Per Gessle.lol.. i can only apply them. I have never had people take such an interest in how i feel, not even my parent’s. No one who really cares anyway. Except my Bf. Thank you all for being very supportive...all of you...
ROXIE
IPPIE said on December 9, 2001 07:48:
You are wellcome !
That is what people should do - care for each other!
Don’t you think so ?
I GUEES IT IS JUST A HOPE ....
THAT DOESN’T MEAN THAT I SHOULDN’T TRY TO MAINTAIN IT !!!
inganakee_leo said on December 9, 2001 07:49:
we’ll be always at your side... I said it before, I’m saying it again...
sweet_stalker57 said on December 9, 2001 08:38:
Baby! get the e-story and pics? :)
I was listening to some Morrissey (in-between Rox discs) and some words seemed to be just for you:
“when your gift unfurls, when your talent becomes apparent
I will roar from the stalls, I will gurgle from the circle
when you name’s with the best, will my name be on your guest list?
I will roar from the stalls, oh the balcony fool was me you fool!” :)
plastic_venus said on December 9, 2001 12:35:
Hey Baby darling don’t be sad, auntie Venus is back to hear all about your problems. Seems that you’re going through a really tough period right now, I’m so sorry to hear that! Remebber taht you’ve always got my sympathy and support...
tinytim said on December 9, 2001 13:41:
Hey, if you leave this place, I will have a reason less to come here...welll I can’t support you the way I did before, but I always remeber you and the other friends here. I’m not gone, like you said. I’m just...not so close, not so often. But I’m still here, Roxie.
The best way to fight is having strategy. Being human is the bigger of all. Some people are so unhappy, their sadness is like a hurricane that drags everyone around. Don’t care about this people. After every hurricane, the sky becomes clean and the ar is pure. Then, only the strongers, that one who can “HOLD” on every reliable foundation will survive. God, Love and The Time are stronger and unbreakable foundations. Just hold on them, and all these storms will leave. Suddenly, you can awake in Hawaii!! (no, no there are hurricanes there, too...) Better: you can awake in some brazilian beach! Maybe I can might appear there with a coconut (warning: I’m working out hard this summer, driking aminoacids and having strong exercises, so, I can look good with a bath suit in the beach, hehehe). Smile, Roxie. I’ll blow some summer from SA to US. SHHHHHHHHH...
roxchurch said on December 9, 2001 23:38:
tinytim
“After every hurricane, the sky becomes clean and the ar is pure. “- thanks man- the day didn’t starts good for me ,but now i’m fine–and i’ll go to do some strong exercises (drink l-karnitene:-),to be ready for the beach:-)))
Is it summer right now in you country??- cos here in Bulgaria is cold winter, “in the coldest time of year darknest ” WAS “all around my heart”- but now because of this forum i found friends , we go (last weekend ) to the mountain(2 200 m!!!–near to our city-) and it was so good– now the sun is in my heart....
So Roxie don’t leave this smalltalks- It’s the small small small talk–That makes it all happen....
If somebody told me before 7-8 months that i found Rox fans in my town and we go to Viena and see Roxette live,even talk to them –i coudn’t believe that.....but all happen....
billyrox said on December 10, 2001 04:40:
Roxie, Mail me! I’m a good ’listener’, if you can listen to an email...?? Been through shit myself so I know where your coming from. And although I’m not wiccan (yet) I know what thats like too when people laugh at you because of your beliefs... You know the address! Drop me a line anytime! I’m here for you!
BB
Billy
Taysan said on December 10, 2001 05:40:
Hey Roxie, it seems that you’ve got a lot of friends here, so I don’t think you have to worry.
I hope you didn’t open my virus mail, otherwise go to www.norton.com and dl the viruskiller program.
Love, Peace, Light and greetz
Taysan
ROXIEBABY16 said on December 10, 2001 07:54:
Which one had a virus??? Cause i might have opened it!!!:((:((:((:((:(( If i did then my new comp is already infected........oh well i don’t think im leaving, hey Tiny i don’t like coconuts but kiwi would be great.......
ROXIE
Taysan said on December 10, 2001 10:47:
The one with an attachment had a virus. But it’s not a dangerous one, I still don’t know what it does, except for sending and replying mails.
But know someone has put a new virusscanner on my computer, a norton. NORTON IS MUCH BETTER THAN MCAFEE!!!! the mcafee really sux, don’t buy it, u can spend your money better. Okay, this was very important information. :)))
taysan/KeviN
JMiykal said on December 13, 2001 20:49:
A pity our old posts aren’t somewhere I can find them... I distinctly recall that RoxieBaby’s smiles have always been a vital part and welcome addition to TDR.
Roxie... been a while since we talked, and I’m hardly ever online (just got done with our big move, finally, and this is my first day of internet access)... and it may be difficult to believe... but in so many ways, I know what some of your life is like. Looking back from several years down the road, I’d have to say that even though a certain segment of my experience really sucked at the time, I’m a far better person for it.
The last thing I would say would be to “get over it” or something like that. That ain’t right. But look yourself in the mirror, and even if you don’t always feel like you want to keep going, the girl in the mirror deserves a future, doesn’t she? If hanging on is tough to do for yourself, then do it for her.
And while I don’t know the specifics of your situation, you might be surprised how often parents turn out to be right. Whatever choices you make now, you still want to feel good about them three, six, ten years from now. Some of them you may never get the chance to undo.
Here’s wishing you a peaceful day...
ROXIEBABY16 said on December 14, 2001 09:23:
hey!!! Now here is someone i have missed greatly!!! I hope you are well, e-mail me at [email protected] I am looking forward to hearing from you. Right now i am busy with doctors who have finally found out what the hell is wrong with me, if anyone really wants to know just ask i am more than willing to share. Today was peaceful until i found out what i have, and the complications etc. with it. Im kinda in a bad spot right now, but i should be fine after i go the doctors again in 2 weeks, hopefully sooner as my pain is great, so if you’ all notice that i am moody i apologize in advance, i am in a great deal of pain and i have to be on alert all the time until i go see the doctors again. Much love and smiles for all!!!:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
ROXIEBABY16
Taysan said on December 14, 2001 13:17:
What?? Are you ill?? I hope it isn’t too bad.
I want to know what’s wrong, if you don’t want to say it here, you can mail me.
Taysan
ROXIEBABY16 said on December 14, 2001 14:02:
I might as well tell you all cause i might have to get surgery in a few weeks and i don’t want everyone thinking i left for good. I have an ovarian cyst. It’s made my ovary 2 times larger than it’s supposed to be according to the ultrasound i got today. I am going to a female doctor soon enough to get it all sorted out. So yes i am ill, but i wont die so don’t worry about that. I just have a lot of pain.
I’ll lbe allright...:):):):):)::):):):))
ROXIE
JMiykal said on December 15, 2001 16:38:
:):)
Soooo sorry, RB. One of my friends here found out about a possible cancer, and I don’t envy you one bit the emotional battle that turns your mind and heart into a war zone. Hope you can cope okay.
I may have some paper info that you might enjoy – but if I ever had your postal address, I’ve since lost it. I’m at Yahoo! under this name – e/m when you feel like it. Now my supper’s getting cold. Take care...
ROXIEBABY16 said on December 16, 2001 08:16:
I will reply asap, right now i am going out in order to keep myself from losing my mind over this...
ROXIE:):):):):):):):):):):))
June_Cooper said on December 17, 2001 05:05:
Hey Roxie:
I passed through the same things. My house was a mess, I also was the maid of the house, and the mother of my mom. I always lived in depression, and still today I’m under treatment with Prozac. Do you think that my familiy understood my point of view?. There was a time when I wanted to die. And I got sick, and was sick for a long, long time in bed, and I almost died, because I didn’t want to live. But when I realized how close I was from death, I thought about the things I wanted in my life. And that’s the key. What do you want from life? Ask yourself. And then go for it, no matter how impossible it could be. Now I’m an Anthropologist, newlywed to a rox fan, and I never was so happy for so many time.
If you want to hear an advice from somebody who felt the same as you, e-mail me. I will be there for you.
June.
Ps: When I was sick, appeared the June Afternoon video. It was full of color and good vibrations. It helped me a lot. Try to find peace of mind in the music, in the books, in your dreams. Happyness will come, someday, if you fight for it.
A big Kiss, darling.
ROXIEBABY16 said on December 21, 2001 12:33:
June,
I know what you mean, the rainbow always comes after the especially hard rains. And those rainbows are the ones to cling to. Cling with all your might, and don’t let go until they are drained of their colour and beauty and another one can uplift you. I have a rainbow right now, but the colour is fading, i am merely spending my time, going thru the motions and waiting for another one.
ROXIE
UrbanEscape said on January 14, 2002 16:51:
Hey RB, I’ve been offline for a time. You’re in my prayers. Take care.
Mfan28179-Jason said on January 14, 2002 18:29:
I missed this post the first time around. I hope you are doing better, Roxie.
ROXIEBABY16 said on January 17, 2002 10:45:
WELL i guess i had better stop floating and start posting again, hey guys long time no see!!!!!!:):):):):):):):):):) I missed all of you!!! I’m back for a little while anyways!!! So whats new with all of you??
Luv, ROXIE:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
ROXIEBABY16 said on November 29, 2001 16:09:
I feel like my welcome has worn out here, i feel out of place. Seriously, so i am not sure if i am leaving, i love some people in here, but, i think that maybe there are too many of my enemies in here.
ROXIE