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My Mom...
7 replies
Majdy said on February 14, 2006 20:02:
I just heard a bad news, that my mom’s mother (my grand mother) died... I am of couse feel sad about this. But more than that, I feel sorry for my mom.... Now she’s all alone. She didn’t have father and mother anymore... and she didn’t have me, her only child.... Because now I’m living ssssooooooo far away from her. She’s in Indonesia, and I’m in USA. The worst thing is, I don’t know when I will ever see her again...
I’ve been crying for hours today. Keep thinking about how my mom will get through this... I tried to call her, but I just can’t get through....
My mom... She’s a wonderful person but never really found her happiness.... My father left her years ago and she tried to be with some men, but always ended up with wrong man....
She never had enough money. She had to work very hard. She’s even already work from very young age. At the age of 6, she’s already has to work in the farm! She’s the only one in her family that never goes to school... although, if she ever been, I knew that she will be one of the smartestet student, and maybe her life won’t be like this....
It’s funny that I never realize how great she is until I lived far away from her....
How she always tried to take care of me, to wash my clothes, to make my food and to listen all my complain of the food that she made :(
How I so mean to her many times.... How I was so rude to her.... I never told her that I’m sorry.... I am too busy thinking about myself...
I never really spend my time with her when I was in Indonesia, I always busy working or thinking about myself...
I wish I could turn back the time and act better....
Damn... I just miss her so much and it hurts so much.... been crying for hours didn’t help at all.... this is just sssooo hurt....
denny said on February 14, 2006 23:10:
Ah Majdy. I know how you must feel, although my situation was not THAT hard. My mom moved away(with her husband and my brother) and I stayed with grandmother. But she’s only 5 minutes away, so it’s ok. And yes, I used to be rude and egoistic often and I realized it (it comes with growing up, I guess) and now I use every opportunity to tell her how much I love her and appreciate everything she did for me. I hope you’ll be able to tell that to your mom. And I’m SURE that she’s happy because you have better life now and because you’re happy. Don’t cry. After the rain comes sun...
Jud (moderator) said on February 15, 2006 06:31:
:(
It must be our stupid human nature, I also realised how great my mum is (and how much I miss her) when I moved from Spain to Austria...
kachina008 said on February 15, 2006 08:28:
Also an issue I’m still grappling with...
I once called up my mom bawling and apologizing because I had never eaten the lunches she prepared for me when I was in school! my mother thought I was going crazy!
ally77 said on February 15, 2006 20:27:
Majdy .... I understand what your going though here.... well kind of.... but its a long story... and this ain’t the place....
Perhaps your mum could come over to the USA for a visit, would that be possible...
Oldag75 said on February 16, 2006 00:19:
Majdy, if it’s not too late, print your post and read it to those gathered at the funeral. I’ve never encountered a more touching eulogy.
Majdy said on February 16, 2006 08:50:
thanks for all your replies...
I finally can call her (thank god!!!). So, I’m feeling much better now. Still miss her though. And I never needed her more than now before (I think Judith was right about the human nature thing).
I plan to bring her oneday to the US, but it still need lots of time, since I just got here, and don’t even have wok permit yet....
All I need is to be stronger and more pattience...
I just hope I could because it just seemed so hard...
Debora said on February 14, 2006 20:16:
I’m so sorry...
Your mom had a hard life but she’s not alone, even you are so far away from her you still can be close, when you call her, tell her all the things you didn’t say to her before, I think that will help you and her. And who knows, maybe someday you could take her to the USA and be together again.